“Feminine energy” has almost become a cliché code word in the recent past.  Society, as far as what I’ve seen lately, has been portrayed it as needing to force our way to have a seat at the table, or – as a complete opposite – being passive.  I’ll be doing a complete workshop in the near future on this topic (be sure to subscribe to the newsletter to stay up to date on the details,)  But in the meantime, here’s what harnessing your feminine energy actually means.

First, let me say that this is not a political piece whatsoever.  I encourage you, and the rest of the world, to stand for their beliefs.  I respect everyone’s opinion and assume that my opinion will be respected as well.  I feel no need to write my views on Facebook to prove a point, nor will I be shouting my opinions from the rooftops.  But, if you would like to know my opinion on anything going on at this point – in society, life, or otherwise – please do not hesitate to ask.  Because I do not share opinions on some topics in this public setting does not mean that I do not have them or that I am shying away from the conversation.

This piece comes from a place of seeing the term “feminine energy” miss-used regularly recently.  I feel as though we are seeing many places where either feminine or masculine energies are being perceived as “bad” or like they need to be redefined.  I do not feel that either of those definitions or redefinitions are necessary.  Because here’s what those actually mean.

Masculine versus Feminine Energies

Masculine and Feminine Energies are often described as a yin and yang.  They play off of each other and you cannot have one without the other.  (Aka, we all have both forms of energy.)

Feminine energy is typically defined as “goodness” and having an understanding of the value of other’s lives.  Masculine energy is defined as “strength” and having a deep value of our own lives.

Having too much of one or the other is not ideal.  If you have too much strength, then you can do harm to others.  But too much goodness means that you can do harm to yourself.

So, we must work to balance out our masculine and feminine energies in order to live out a complete life.

Where We Are Today

While hormones do come into play in finding our masculine and feminine energies, much of finding our personal “balance point” comes from who we have come to be as people.  What you were raised perceiving as “good” and what society has taught you through your experiences, helps to develop where you are today in balancing between the yin and yang of the two energies.

My personal feeling is that, at least in America, we are moving towards an over-dominance of masculine energy.  We are raised always wanting to get 1st place, we attempt to force our opinions on others through social media or in person, we put on a hypothetical armor in the workplace to be ready to fight in a “man’s world,” we think that goodness and kindness are symbols of being weak, and, instead, we assert our strength in some way.

This is not to say that all feminine energy is lost, but that I feel that society, in general, is moving towards wanting to assert our individual strength, rather than accepting the goodness of others and displaying it in return.

How to Harness Our Feminine Energy

Because of the aforementioned reason, I have a goal to focus on harnessing my feminine energy to cultivate it as much as possible.  Here are some ways that you can do the same.

Slow the f down

The mantra of feminine energy is, “I amplify in stillness.”  When we’re committed to constantly go and do, we do not leave space for our feminine energy to thrive.

There are many ways we can strengthen our ability to accept and appreciate the stillness.  Personally, I am focusing on meditation.  If that’s not your cup of tea, then actually schedule time to simply relax with a literal cup of tea or glass of wine.  Spend your time allowing yourself to feel your true power.  Your intuition and answers will always be found in the stillness.

Focus on the experience over purely results

Culturally, we have grown to be entirely focused on getting results.  Where do you want to be?  How can you get to that point as fast as possible?

But, for whatever reason, we naturally assume that we know what that end point should be rather than allowing nature to take its course.  But who can even imagine what goodness might be waiting for us on the other side if we let loose a little bit to enjoy the experience.

Focus on creating a vision of the qualities you want to embody, rather than saying the exact results that you want to achieve, to manifest something greater than you could ever imagine.

Tune into the lunar cycle

Honesty day – I’ve never bee a big astrology fan.  But when I heard of the concept of Saturn Return and recognized immediately how much it applied to my own life, I knew that I wanted to learn more.

According to many astrologists, each of us has our own lunar cycle.  (You can calculate your own here.)  When we discover where we are in our lunar cycle, we are able to see what we need at that point compared to how we are feeling.

As an example, when the full moon is coming, we are in a state of union.  We have amplified energy and are able to manifest intentions.  Both within a full moon and new moon, we are in a good space to set intentions, compared to when we are in our first quarter moon and are facing external resistance.

Always remember that you carry both your masculine and feminine energies with you where ever you go.  Become balanced to recognize the strengths of both worlds.

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All photos by Victor of Valencia.